Dating and Relationship

Posts Tagged ‘Dating Tips’

No matter how old you are, you may be new to dating. Maybe you spent time on your studies and career, or maybe you’ve had a string of long-term relationships without much dating in between. Either way, there are a few key beginner dating tips you should follow to make yourself more attractive and generally enjoy the experience more.

Hygiene

Take care of yourself. In a perfect world, you would be judged solely by the content of your character. Unfortunately, the world is not perfect, and the best personality can be eclipsed by bad breath, bad body odor, or unkempt clothing. So, take your time while you’re in the shower, brush your teeth for three minutes twice a day, floss, and use mouthwash.

Appearance

You should also wear clothes that flatter your body shape and make you look good. This is key for two reasons. The first is the obvious — looking good makes people respond to you better. However, it will also make you feel more confident than you would if you were wearing a ratty sweater and your high school sweatpants. This confidence will show, and make your dates more successful.

Exercise is key for the same reason. If you look more fit, you will look better. The fact that you’re meeting your fitness goals and releasing endorphins will also make you feel good about yourself, which will translate into confidence that makes you look more attractive.

Conversation

Listen more than you speak. This is key for two reasons. For one, it’s easier to ask a leading question and listen than it is to come up with things to say. By thinking of your dates in terms of listening rather than speaking, you will feel more confident as you won’t fear the dreaded “awkward silence” as much.

People also enjoy talking about themselves. If you let people talk about their lives, they will relate to you and feel more connected to you, even though all you did was listen to them.

Manners

Be nice. This doesn’t just mean be nice to the people you’re dating. Be nice to the waiter, the bartender, and essentially anyone you see. This is a good tip for your entire life, so it applies to dating as well.

If you’re a generally nice person (rather than someone who fakes it for dates), the people you meet and date will sense this, and you will seem more attractive. This doesn’t mean you should be a pushover.

It just means you should thank people when they do things for you, take an interest in other people, and generally recognize that you’re not the only person in the universe. That’s really all there is to it.

The ability to successfully navigate the waters of dating takes courage, commitment and confidence. Whether it’s your first trip out out to sea, or you’re back out looking for other fish, some tips from people who’ve been there before can help make the trip a little less turbulent.

Tip #1: Share Selectively

Giving out too much information about yourself too soon can get uncomfortable fast. Generally, progress from talking about things, to ideas, to feelings and behaviors.

Keep the conversation during first or second dates to light subjects, such as places you’ve been, cars you like and restaurants that have interesting foods. Slowly move into other areas.

Once you establish a solid foundation, ease into subjects that include past romantic history, embarrassing behavior you may have experienced and your finances.

Moving into a level of intimacy too fast can scare off a reserved potential mate.

Tip #2: Don’t Compare

Don’t compare your date to an ex. Save the comparisons for when you’re shopping for car insurance.

Tip #3: Scorecards Are Meant for Bowling

When your girlfriend complains that you didn’t tell her you were inviting another couple along on your date, don’t bring up the time she brought her little sister to the movies with you.

Bringing up old offenses to defend your behavior is immature and shows that you haven’t forgiven her for her previous grievance. Rather, ask her why it bothers her and be willing to apologize and/or compromise.

Tip #4: Don’t Be A Hypocrite

Don’t complain to your boyfriend about something you do, too. Hypocrisy is unattractive and breeds resentment.

Tip #5: Change Is for the Meter

Don’t continue dating someone in hopes they will change a behavior that you just can’t stand. Tell her why her behavior bugs you and see if it changes. If her behavior is a deal breaker, end it sooner rather than later.

Tip #6: Hiding From Intimacy

Emotional intimacy is the foundation of a good relationship. If you clam up when your boyfriend talks about jealousy toward your ex, he may feel he’s the only one sharing. Comments like, “Whatever” or “I don’t care” relay an attitude that says, “I don’t really want to get to know you better.” Read the rest of this entry »