Dating and Relationship

Archive for the ‘Online Dating’ Category

Dating is easier now that it ever has been, because there are more ways to meet other people than ever before. So why do people still have trouble finding the ideal partner? It may be that you are looking in the wrong places and going about finding your ideal partner in the wrong way. Armed with the right knowledge, you will have no trouble finding the partner you have been waiting to meet.

Online Dating

Online dating may be a good idea for those who are looking for a certain dating niche, such as a partner who has a similar interest or hobby. Even the most obscure of interests often have dating sites serving their respective niche. If you are looking for a partner who shares your interest in vampires or Ayn Rand, then online dating may be your answer.

The “Other” Place

According to “The Social Organization of Sexuality: Sexual Practices in the United States,” a 1994 study done at the University of Chicago, the most common places that couples met was “other.” This means couples aren’t meeting at a bar or nightclub, or a “single mingle” type event.

The next time you are at the grocery store and you notice someone interesting on the cereal aisle, strike up a conversation with him.

Don’t Ignore the Obvious

According to the same study, the second most common place where couples met was at school or work. You already share something in common with the people at your university and workplace; use that as a starting point and see what else you may have in common. Strike up a conversation at the water cooler, or join a fellow student for lunch.

NLP

NLP, or neuro-linguistic programming, provides a systematic approach to effective communication. Techniques of this nature include attaching positive attributes to yourself, mirroring and creating rapport.

This may help you once you’ve engaged the other person in a conversation. Several instructors teach this technique, but do some research and make sure that you are learning from someone who is actually an authority on the subject.

When it comes to dating, everyone can use a tip or two. Dating is tricky business, especially with all the mixed signals, frustrations, and surprises along the way. Luckily, there are several nice tips that can help smooth out the bumpy road ahead.

Keep Your Eyes Open

For some reason, many people will cast a light of immediate trust upon any mutual acquaintance, but refuse to date someone that hasn’t been “vouched for” by a friend. This option can severely limit the dating prospects available.

One tip to keep in mind is that a quality partner can be anywhere. So it’s important to not discount anyone, whether they’re at a local grocery store, library, or restaurant. Always be on the lookout.

Socializing

Socializing is a key to successful dating. The more people you meet, the more options you have in the dating game. Although you might get lucky without socializing, you want to tilt the odds in your favor by socializing as much as possible during this time period.

This can be as simple as meeting friends up when invited, or attending parties, get-togethers, and local community functions.

Go Online

Online dating has risen in popularity over the past 20 years. Although it might seem like a non-serious type of dating, it can be one of the most efficient and effective methods–especially for people with very little time on their hands.

Online dating allows people to date in their spare time, weeding through pictures and information that they know will not interest them. It also opens up your social circle to far more people than what would be possible without the use of the Internet. Read the rest of this entry »

People falter from time to time while navigating the difficult world of relationships. When moving through your next romantic relationship, increase your chances of success by considering — and avoiding — some of the more serious relationship killers. By taking care to sidestep these relationship enders, you can likely increase the length and happiness of your next romance.

Oversharing

Opening up to your partner is important, but telling him everything about yourself right from the start isn’t a wise choice. If you over-share, telling your new relationship partner about every embarrassing event that has ever occurred or ways that a guy has done you wrong, you will likely overwhelm him and scare him off.

Putting up a Front

While you do want to put your best foot forward when entering a new relationship, you shouldn’t adopt a persona entirely unlike your true self. If you try to pretend that you are a musical theater-loving, artistic guy when your idea of a good time is drinking a beer and watching football, the relationship you do form will be built upon false pretenses and long-term survival will be unlikely.

Living in the Past

Remembering the mistakes of the past is important, but allowing the things that have happened in the past to interfere with your future is not. Don’t continually mention your old relationships or keep thinking that the things that went wrong before will go wrong again. If you do, you may create a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Moving Too Fast

Even if the strong emotions that you feel at the start of the relationship incline you to push your relationship forward quickly, doing so is likely a bad idea. If you press down on the accelerator too hard, you may cause damage to your relationship and decrease the sustainability of the romantic union.

Moving Too Slowly

Selecting the proper speed for moving your relationship along is challenging. While pushing your relationship forward at lightning-fast speed isn’t good, neither is allowing it to stay the same or stagnate.

Sweating the Small Stuff

There will likely be things about your romantic partner that could offend you, be it his tendency to leave his dirty socks on the bathroom floor or his inability to put the toilet seat down. If you allow these small things to bother you, however, you may just ruin what could be a beautiful relationship.

Pushing Issues Aside

When you encounter relationship issues, you may be eager to push them aside and pretend that they don’t exist. While doing so can seem the best option, it can actually set you up for relationship trouble later as these issues will almost undoubtedly resurface.

Dishonesty

What start out as little white lies can rapidly escalate. Be honest at all costs to allow the development of a real and meaningful relationship.

Not Being Responsive

Your partner will likely show you what she needs in the relationship, be it more attention from you or more physical contact. If she gives off signs that she wants you around more and you ignore them, you may ultimately fail to give her what she requires and ruin your relationship.

Staying in a Failed Relationship

While putting some effort into your relationship is often a wise choice, putting all of your effort into a relationship that is doomed is a poor choice. If you know that the flaws in your relationship are too big to overcome, don’t stick with it out of a fear of being alone.

Online dating opens up a whole new world of possibilities when it comes to finding Mr. or Ms. Right, but it can also open a Pandora’s box of dating disasters. As with traditional dating, knowing what to expect and how to behave increases your chances of finding someone special, while avoiding possible pitfalls.

Finding Love Online

Almost anywhere you go online, you can find love. From gaming sites to chat rooms to forums on any topic, there’s potential for a relationship to develop.

In a poll by Lovingyou.com, 83 percent of people who reported they had found love online met their significant other in a chat room. Online personals are another venue for meeting people—for purely online relationships or for real-life dating.

Getting to Know Each Other

It can be more difficult to truly know someone you’ve only met online. Breaking down barriers and learning about each other takes time and effort for both parties.

Lovingyou.com provides some tips for getting to know your online love, including a daily “getting to know you” email—trade questions and answers about your interests, hobbies and history.

Or make it a guessing game about your favorite book, movie, game or food, using a list of questions that you each answer separately, before going over them together. Afterward, you can tell each other the right answers.

You can help your online mate learn about your life and the city you live in by leading a “web tour.” Make a list of URLs and include a personal story or memory from each of the places or things you would like to show. Ask your partner to do the same for you.

Look for Red Flags

In the first stages of getting to know someone online, you can weed out suitors who may not be what they claim to be. Just as when getting to know someone during traditional dating, pay attention to things the person says or does that might not work for you in a long-term relationship.

For example, if the person fails to provide current photos or legitimate contact information, that could be a red flag. If she says one thing on her profile but something different in person or via email; angers or gets irritated easily; or if something he says or does makes you feel uncomfortable, trust your instincts.

If undesirable behaviors show themselves through email or chat, those behaviors will appear in real life, too.
Making It Work

Online relationships take as much or even more work as real life relationships. Make time for your online love, just as you would in the off-line world.

Develop and maintain trust and honesty—communicating clearly to avoid misunderstandings—and work to resolve conflict in a healthy way. Think of what you would do if your love lived in the same city, and translate those words or actions into the online environment. Putting in the extra effort ensures your relationship stays strong until you meet face to face.